Teen Talk had a meeting about rape and sexual assault yesterday. The guest speaker from MOCSA gave statistics, advice and posed scenarios of rape to the teens. The two most important items MOCSA says is 1. It is NEVER the victims fault and 2. It is about control and power for the rapist.
One in four women will be sexually abused in their lifetime
One in seven men will be sexually abused in their lifetime
1 in 8 women have been raped
A rape is reported in the greater Kansas City area every other day. Only 16% of all rapes are ever reported
Over 80% of sexual violence is committed by someone the victim knows, not by a stranger
Children, young women ages 15-25 and persons with developmental disabilities are the most frequent victims of sexual violence
One of the situations the speaker presented last night's youth with was a young woman, impairing her ability to think clearly because she had been drinking and was therefore raped. A large number of teens spoke out saying the woman who had been drinking was at fault for being raped. I woke up thinking about what the teens were saying that she wasn't using common sense and should have known better, and I wondered how they could think that anyone deserves to be raped. I want to quote the Declaration of Independence as it seems most applicable in this situation.
We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, — That whenever any Form of Government (PERSON) becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it.... laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness..and accordingly all experience hath shewn that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Government, and to provide new Guards for their future security. ...
I edited the paragraph quoted taking out a few sentences that did not totally apply to the situation. However, there were at most five lines I deleted. I highlighted the two lines that I thought were the most significant to the conversation.
The first, "We hold these truths to be self evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness."
This sentence says that you have the right to live your life and find happiness and no one can disrupt your right to finding happiness (and vice versa, your rights end where another person's rights begin). That means, you have the right to become intoxicated and NO ONE has the right to violate your body.
If a similar situation were posed, I wonder if you would all agree that this person "deserves" to be raped. Let's say you go to the hospital to get your tonsils out or some other routine surgery that you chose to have done, but is not a life-threatening necessity. While under anesthesia a nurse/ doctor/ hospital employee/ visitor, rapes you, did you bring it on yourself? YOU chose to have the surgery, YOU knew you would have anesthesia that would impair your ability to make accurate decisions, just like drinking too much alcohol. But you NEVER deserve to be raped or sexually assaulted.
The second line I highlighted applies towards the line of thinking that some people deserve to be raped, because they "enjoy it" or they impair themselves and make bad decisions. "All experience hath shewn that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed."
I chose this line because; throughout history it has been used as an example of why denying people freedom was permitted even though people knew better. The reason we continue to discriminate against rape victims is because someone taught us that the victim could ever be at fault, and although that person is unequivocally wrong, we continue to agree and argue on their behalf because it is easier to agree with someone than to fight back and say they are incorrect.
I want you to rethink of the scenario of the woman who drank too much alcohol and walked home alone, remove yourself from the position that you have been raised to believe that anyone ever deserves to have their own person, their own body, violated and consider a situation where that could happen to you. For instance, you and a friend are out on a bridge that you know could collapse, and it does, and you fall and are knocked unconscious, your "friend" rapes you. Did you deserve it? You CHOSE to be at the wrong place at the wrong time, but how can you predict the behaviors of another?
Humans are not concrete; we cannot be put into a beaker and studied. For every 100 people NOT raping another, one person DOES rape. That one person is never right, no matter what position you are in, what influence you are under. You have the right to say no and decide what enters your body.
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